all 46 excuses on my friends wall, 

1. i was just really, really early for tomorrow

2. we can’t all be usain bolt

3. in this day and age, we shouldn’t need labels like “late”

4. i had pe first period do you blame me

5. i really, really didn’t want to sing

6. my brother thought it would be hilarious to drop me outside the prison gates

7. you can’t tell me how to live my life

8. #YOLO

9. my legs fell off and i had to roll all the way to the emergency clinic

10. there was a freak yachting accident

11. i am a fucking retard

12. this is just for my wall

13. do you even read these

14. “it does not matter how slow you go, so long as you do not stop

15. i spent my entire night writing tom daley fanfiction

16. my father left my mother for an air hostess seven years ago do you expect me to get over that emotional trauma overnight

17. sarah palin and i got into a twitter war and i couldn’t leave and let her win

18. traffic jammy jammy jam

19. how can i go to school when alex turner

20. my sim was having an emotional meltdown and i needed to be there for her

21. i was sticking it to the man

22. i spent my entire night worrying if i would ever lose my virginity 

23. fifty shades of late; i was walking and then i caught the eye of an attractive member of the opposite sex and we began exchanging significant looks and i knew we would one day make sweet love so i just walked alongside him and tried to catch his eye and to be continued

24. part two he was playing hard to get so we walked and walked and he had the perfect hair colour it was sort of beige brown anyway it turned out he was walking to a bus stop so obviously i had to catch the bus because true love and silently we rode out to papakura and into the sunset

25. my meth lab caught fire

26. my bed is more comfortable than your school will ever be

27. i was sad

28. it was a nice day, so i walked leisurely

29. i had beat my younger brother for saying “swag”

30. i had to travel back to the 1950’s to ensure my birth

31. 2 kool 4 scool

32. i had to stop, collaborate and listen

33. i tried

34. i’m sorry i’m late

      it’s not my fault

      my auntie was killed

      and i joined a cult

35. a haiku about lateness:

late late late late late

late late late late late late late

 late late late late late

36. my best friend was telling me how to give a satisfactory blow job i wish i was joking

37. i was fashionably late

38. i was caught in a flash mob true story omfg

39. i did not choose the late life, the late life chose me

40. do

41. you

42. even

43. read

44. these

45. i was fighting al qaeda

46. traffic


the post that doesn’t age



"But first, my bona fides: I’m an autistic person who has an autistic son. We’re all kinds of non-neurotypical in my house.

Look, it’s not that autistic children don’t love you, it’s that we express differently. No, my son doesn’t hang onto me like a monkey. Of course, I wouldn’t deal well with that either….”

The bit about the kid expressing love through gifts really hits home for me. When I was little, I had a friend next door, and looking back - if I’m kinda autistic, which I’ve definitely started to suspect I am, he definitely was. We kind of gravitated toward each other and although we never put it in as many words, I think it was because we were operating on similar kinds of brainweird.

We exchanged little gifts all the time, but after the first couple of times, I stopped sharing the things he gave me with my parents - because they told me I shouldn’t accept so many things from him, because it meant he was trying to buy my friendship. Which made no sense to me; he was my friend, I wouldn’t have been playing with him if he wasn’t. The presents were an expression of something that was already there.




i cannot believe that we were robbed of this book scene

This is no joke. These are direct lines from the book.




me: I told you my thing I’m going to write a blog post about right
about how people who kill themselves shouldn’t be defined by it?
like people can fight the desire to kill themselves 1000 times
and then when they die it’s like
“oh, they LOST”
they didn’t lose, it’s 1000 to 1

This is exactly what I want to remind people of today re: Robin Williams

There are going to be people out there who are feeling like: ‘if he couldn’t do it, how can I?’

He did do it, though.  He won.  For 63 years he beat that shit.

When you live with mental illness, you can face suicidal ideation on a daily basis (I know I do).  And for 63 years he did.  He succeeded, he excelled, and (for his time) managed to do it with compassion, ethics, and empathy.

He is not, to me, someone who ‘failed to fight mental illness and addiction’.

He was victorious for 30 years longer than I have been.  For many years longer than many of us make it.  He is a winner and we can all be inspired by how long he survived and by the life he lived.  He makes me feel like I can make it another 30 at least.

Robin Williams: 63 years a winner.






positive lady characters meme | Martha Jones + powerful/feminist moment

I was 900% prepared for her to flip the bird for science in this scene like oh here’s the bones of the finger that I use to say ‘fuck you’

hey remember when we used to have companions who were actualized individuals and not just puzzles to be solved

Re: her flipping the bird, she kind of does. I mean she specifically points out the bones in her middle finger rather than any of the others, and the shot lingers on her upraised hand. She leaves herself a degree of plausible deniability but the fuck you is very much implied.




there’s a copy of the declaration of independence on the bulletin board in my western civ class


today while my teacher was out of the room i stole it and put this up in its place


my teacher laughed and asked who took it but nobody told on me so i got away with it


i did it i stole the declaration of independence

nic cage is proud



"…See my co-workers standing around looking somber and respectful? They’re not there to just have a presence of authority, they are studying you. They are watching the family dynamic and will report back to me with any potential angles I can play to manipulate your emotions, which family members are taking it the hardest and will therefore be the easiest prey, and their estimation of your financial well-being. If, by the way, you appear to be less affluent, I’ll tell you to take your business elsewhere. This is not a hospital and I don’t provide a service – this is a business. If you aren’t paying me (in full and up front, generally), all you’re getting is my sympathy."

(Full disclosure: I found out about this stuff years ago and instantly became intent on never allowing my body to become part of this kind of grief theater. My body is going to medical science [there are never enough cadavers for medical students to work on]. Putative funeral money will instead be spent on a wake with good catering.)