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John must explain Godhood to his date after an unfortunate incident with peanut sauce and resurrection.He starts to make whistling wheezy noises about thirty seconds into the levitating strobe light phase of his resurrection. Over the weird Star Trek sound effects (where are those even coming from?) she can tell he’s laughing.
“Did you just…” she helps him back into his chair, noting the way his hair looks freshly washed, how the red sauce stains have vanished from where he’d dripped all over his weird blue t-shirt during the (mediocre) pasta course. “Did you just die and come back?”
“Kind of.” He clears his throat and waves at the gawking room full of patrons, several of whom look ready to bolt at any moment.
“That’s, um… not normal.”
The waiter brings them fresh drinks and sincere apologies from the chef for the mix-up, which John shrugs off with a grin.
“It’s kind of a mystical god type of deal. Don’t ask me which of the others reinvented the peanut when we were making this place. It was probably Karkat being an asshole. Hey, have you ever seen the Princess Bride?”
this is fucking delightful
207 notes (via roachpatrol & vastderp)
Your daily reminder that John is currently in a session where a man that looks, acts, and is genetically exactly like his dead father is alive and well, but this Dad is NOT his Dad and has no memories or emotional connections to John as his son.
And eventually John will find out about him.
You’re welcome.
You little shit.
Dad Crocker and Dad Egbert aren’t genetically identical, though - Dad Crocker is the son of Poppop Crocker and an unknown woman, and Dad Egbert is the son of Nanna Egbert and an unknown man. They do appear to be strikingly similar in appearance, personality, and probably at least some aspects of their lived experience.
Which actually just means that the Dad-doppleganger recognition is potentially mutual. Each may recognize the other as his father; neither will recognize the other as his son.
49 notes (via pfdiva & toochstuck)
I think we both know the real joke here is that john gave himself a kissing pep talk.
(dinaner helped me a bunch with this comic thank you babe)
1,418 notes (via boltstuck & poidkea)
living 2000 miles away from the nearest human being does not fare well with dirk’s smooth wooing techniques
can you imagine though? the two groups of kids meet, jake and dirk are broken up, and suddenly dirk sees john: this perfect jake look-alike that hangs out with his super-cool bro, with actual powers and a degree of experienced maturity and at least some semblance of a clue.
and here’s dirk, caught totally off guard and young and inexperienced and tongue tied, and it took him three years to work up the nerve and a sufficiently cunning plan to make a move on jake, and now he has one chance to make a good impression and so he says literally the first thing that pops into his head.
and then immediately realizes exactly what a fucking tool he sounds like.
but john is just sort of all “yeah they are cool, you must be dave’s bro, haha do you rap too” yada yada yada being really cheerful and friendly, and dirk just sort of goes weak with relief but let’s his shades hide it and plays it cool and falls in love all over again.
damn now i made myself ship it.
excuse me but this is glorious
6,766 notes (via azzandra & zillyh00)
rose and john having a bisexuality crisis over coffee
IS THIS THE BEST PICTURE EVER? ALL SIGNS POINT TO YES.
4,565 notes (via sleipnirohara & fastpuck)
There is no words to describe how happy I was that they showed the signless and the dolorosa
She’s just like….
what is that thing…. DON’T TOUCH MY FUCKING BABY!!!hissing trolls: confirmed
dolorosa hot teen mom of the millennia: confirmed
let’s play “who’s the person who got their voice pitched”.
this worked out a little too well to be okay.
IS THAT NIC CAGE
oh my GOD
16,551 notes (via hummingbirdprince & douchedag)
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