hoursago:

for real though look me in the eye and tell me which is more likely for these two

memosfromfury:

[Submitted by: peninmyhair

In light of recent events, all personnel are reminded that by DEFINITION all gifts from Agent Wilson are to be classified as “unsolicited.” No matter what the occasion. Even if he manages to get your birthday right. DO. NOT. ACCEPT.]

((A reference to this previous memo.))

memosfromfury:

[Submitted by: NezumiPi

Should Tuesday’s circumstances ever repeat themselves, our liability-reduction officer would like to issue the following clarifications:

• Skilled, trained civilians (e.g., EMTs, police officers, etc.) may be deputized when necessary.
• Thor is reminded that deputizing street vendors does not obligate them to give him free food.
• Mr. Stark is reminded that making air quotes around the word “deputize” does not free him to use this emergency procedure as a pick up line.
• All staff (esp. Hawkeye and the Hulk) are reminded that deputizing animals is NEVER considered an appropriate course of action, though in hindsight, the cell phone videos of the Hulk running around Central Park yelling, “THIS DUCK OF SHIELD!  AND THIS DUCK OF SHIELD!” may have been good PR.]

goddamnshark:

beastlyart:

Not into Avengers stuff at all, but I’m laughing my ass off at this.

Oh, Norse mythology, oh you.